Trapped. I feel trapped within my own head. I want OUT!!! LET ME OUT OF HERE!!!
My alters try to help, but I find myself feeling more like Quasimodo every day. Sometimes I wonder if I don’t deserve to feel real love and warmth. Love is so wonderful sometimes, but other times it can be as cold as ice and as unforgiving as the slice of a knife. Is love really worth all we go through for it? Is killing worth it? Is cheating worth it? Why do people go to such lengths for it? I know why.
Love fills you with such a warmth and a light unlike any other found on this earth. You feel safe and wanted, like the way a stuffed animal must feel being hugged at night by a child.
But when it is gone, it feels like you have been stabbed in the heart with ice. It’s so painful that once the ice is within, it’s very hard to remove from one’s heart. You don’t want to touch it because it hurts too much. So you push through because what else can you do?
It’s time to pull out the ice. It’s time to face the pain.
Stay wicked.